


Fenderbender

by Badficwriter (Lamashtar)



Category: Daredevil (Comics), Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, Spider-Man (Comicverse)
Genre: M/M, Sexual Humor, Sillyfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-12-02
Updated: 2003-12-02
Packaged: 2018-04-22 20:23:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4849259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lamashtar/pseuds/Badficwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spiderman/Daredevil.  How do these pairings happen?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fenderbender

**Human error, not mechanical failure, is the cause of most accidents.**

**-The Science of Forensic Accident Reconstruction and Impact Dynamics**

 

In one of those bizarre scientific accidents, involving a number of improbable coincidences only another superhero would believe, of the type that proctologists include in casual conversation at otherwise boring parties, a naked Daredevil tripped, fell and got a portion of his anatomy stuck in a naked Spider-man.

 

"Wait, wait, don't worry about it, I have just the thing to slide you out."

"Doesn't that stuff turn to steel-strong glue?"

"Only when air hits it! You're just going to have to use it on the inside, out of the air."

"Uh, okay...uh. Oops?"

"What? What?"

"It's turned solid. You know, steel-strong webbing solid."

"Hunh. ..I guess there's air in there."

It was a million to one shot, of course. Actually, the odds more closely resembled the sorts of equations used when respectable astronomers try to calculate the current size of the universe (less respectable astronomers get laid more often).

 

"Am I gay, now?"

"Shut up, and stop wiggling!"

"I'm not  _wiggling_. Hey! Are you enjoying this?"

"I have _super-sensitive_ skin!"

"You're buying me dinner. At least."

"Why would I take you to dinner  _afterward_?"

"I think you should remember that I have something important of yours. If you want it back undamaged, you better treat me like a gentleman. I have super-strength, you know."

"Point taken. No movie?"

"Not on a first date."

"Have I ever mentioned how much I admire this webbing invention of yours? I mean, the sheer genius-"

"Aw, shut up."

Somewhat to both men's dismay, Spider-man's webbing proved not only highly pliable and steel-strong, but also had a _sproingy_ effect that gave it some give and take. So when the two men attempted to separate by pulling apart, it gave...until it didn't anymore. Then it took back and then some.

 

"OH MY GOD!"

"Spider-man!? Spider-man, are you okay?"

"...Try it again."

 

Much later, the lawyer said it was an act of God, due to statistical improbability, to escape liability. The scientist called it an example of impact dynamics. In rear-end collisions.

 

And they both deemed it worthy of further study.

**Author's Note:**

> Someone was mocking ridiculous pairings, and suggested they came about perhaps because the two individuals both happened to be naked and walking around, and one slipped....;)
> 
> Reposted to A3O from Fanfiction.net


End file.
